…My thoughts on what I do…

Last year when I started my photography business, I never imagined that it would grow as it has. I actually never realized that photography was something that I would love so much. I still hesitate to call myself a photographer. I guess I never thought that something I did, that always felt so natural, was anything out of the ordinary special. This past year has been somewhat of a journey for me. I went out on a whim, with much fear, and bought a ‘real’ camera. The big kind. You know the big black camera and the bulky camera bag too. It cost us the entire economic stimulus check, which was a pretty big deal because we were good and poor.  My hope at the time was to pursue a small dream.  I would buy a camera, take some pictures of my little guy, family friends, and if at all possible, make a extra buck here and there. Really my biggest desire was to have a creative outlet. Being a stay at home mom, my life was all about my one year old son, Manoah.  All creative projects came to a halt when he entered the world. I didn’t have the endless hours to sit at a coffee shop, journal, and reflect on life anymore. I needed to find a new way to stay connected to Anjuli, to be who I was, and not lose my voice in the everyday mom-ness that so consumed me. (all moms reading this know exactly what i am talking about). so… i bought my camera and started shooting.

Sometimes I lose sight of why i started taking pictures. I get caught up in the latest photography trend, or marketing technique, or compare myself endlessly to all the other amazing photographers out there. I get lost in the busyness: sending emails, editing, albums, sending more emails, to-do lists, updating my website or blog, and then I start to feel it… panic. I get carried away in all the ‘stuff’ and forget that photography for me isn’t about making this business something BIG,  or even earning an income, or trying to reach a goal to book ‘x’ amount of weddings in a month, or keeping up with other photographers style. i don’t want photography to be about a business or a marketing plan… (to be honest, I am just not good at any of that stuff).  Photography for me is about being connect to me and my love to create. People often ask me if I love photography and i always hesitate to answer. I actually don’t LOVE photography. I LOVE what photography allows me to do. I love creating. I love being with people and allowing who they are to come alive.  Creating pictures with peoples bodies to convey a story is what makes my insides light up.  I want my photography to be relational and meaningful. I want the images I capture to be pure, fun, and authentic, personal and simple.  I think that it is has taken me a whole year to articulate this and it feels good to finally understand this little passion I have for photography.   My thoughts on what I do… i guess i wrote this more for me. A good little reminder to myself.

…and when i forget why i do what i do, i always have little faces around me reminding me too. a picture of the latest little addition to our family. meet: Samuel Joseph Cash Paschall_09june_035-103

by Anjuli

show 6 comments

Lindsey - I'm not quite sure how I stumbled across your website or this post, but I am so happy that I did. I have to agree with the previous comment from Megan - I too am just starting out, and this is a reminder of why I'm pursuing this passion. Thank you, and all the best to you!February 18, 2011 - 7:04 am

Megan Alvarez - I stumbled upon this post at the perfect time, and put simply, your words have nourished me. I am a newbie photographer who has just begun to chase my dream. I am somewhere between the very fearful, frustrating, and panicky stage and the excited, adventurous, risk-taking stage, without much footing on either. At times when I am straddled with doubt, I read posts (and view images) like these and am rejuvenated and inspired. Thank you. =)January 7, 2011 - 4:35 pm

wanida maertz - i love everything you said, and the way you said it. i'm so lucky to be related to you.July 27, 2009 - 8:50 pm

malina - I love that you are growing into your photographer's skin.July 27, 2009 - 6:43 pm

Sam Paschall - I love who you are becoming through this and what you are discovering about yourself. I am so proud of you - you take absolutely beautiful pictures and help people believe in the goodness of life and the beauty of love. I will always walk with you in this journey.July 27, 2009 - 4:20 pm

Millie Redding - Proud of you Anjuli! Glad that you followed your dream. Looking forward to seeing you next week. Thanks for all that you are doing to make the Japanese homesay such a success story. Love, GrandmaJuly 27, 2009 - 11:26 am

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