Last year when I started my photography business, I never imagined that it would grow as it has. I actually never realized that photography was something that I would love so much. I still hesitate to call myself a photographer. I guess I never thought that something I did, that always felt so natural, was anything out of the ordinary special. This past year has been somewhat of a journey for me. I went out on a whim, with much fear, and bought a ‘real’ camera. The big kind. You know the big black camera and the bulky camera bag too. It cost us the entire economic stimulus check, which was a pretty big deal because we were good and poor. My hope at the time was to pursue a small dream. I would buy a camera, take some pictures of my little guy, family friends, and if at all possible, make a extra buck here and there. Really my biggest desire was to have a creative outlet. Being a stay at home mom, my life was all about my one year old son, Manoah. All creative projects came to a halt when he entered the world. I didn’t have the endless hours to sit at a coffee shop, journal, and reflect on life anymore. I needed to find a new way to stay connected to Anjuli, to be who I was, and not lose my voice in the everyday mom-ness that so consumed me. (all moms reading this know exactly what i am talking about). so… i bought my camera and started shooting.
Sometimes I lose sight of why i started taking pictures. I get caught up in the latest photography trend, or marketing technique, or compare myself endlessly to all the other amazing photographers out there. I get lost in the busyness: sending emails, editing, albums, sending more emails, to-do lists, updating my website or blog, and then I start to feel it… panic. I get carried away in all the ‘stuff’ and forget that photography for me isn’t about making this business something BIG, or even earning an income, or trying to reach a goal to book ‘x’ amount of weddings in a month, or keeping up with other photographers style. i don’t want photography to be about a business or a marketing plan… (to be honest, I am just not good at any of that stuff). Photography for me is about being connect to me and my love to create. People often ask me if I love photography and i always hesitate to answer. I actually don’t LOVE photography. I LOVE what photography allows me to do. I love creating. I love being with people and allowing who they are to come alive. Creating pictures with peoples bodies to convey a story is what makes my insides light up. I want my photography to be relational and meaningful. I want the images I capture to be pure, fun, and authentic, personal and simple. I think that it is has taken me a whole year to articulate this and it feels good to finally understand this little passion I have for photography. My thoughts on what I do… i guess i wrote this more for me. A good little reminder to myself.
…and when i forget why i do what i do, i always have little faces around me reminding me too. a picture of the latest little addition to our family. meet: Samuel Joseph Cash Paschall