…orange wednesday…

heard.

i choked. the emotion of this moment hit me so hard that i choked, caught my breath and tried to focus my camera again for the next shot. you may not see what i see in this picture and it could easily be a photo that gets overlooked, except that i know these two people. i know their story. i know how far they have come and how much they have invested. i know how they held each other up and never let the other one fall. how they surfed and prayed and loved and lost and laughed.   this is  sam embracing justin, his best friend,  after giving a toast at his wedding last weekend. it was the kind of hug ‘with the extra squeeze.’ the hug that if it had words would say, “you mean more to me than you could ever know.” and that’s what justin has been to my husband… the friend that saw him, heard him and loved him. and being heard, really heard, is a gift.

and when she dropped by last week and handed me a little bag, filled with tissue, i was given the gift of being heard, really heard. kelley. she is the kind of friend that takes you in, into her heart. kelley made me a mini-quilt inspired from my post on thrive. this gift now sits under my keyboard and when i get discouraged, i see the little octopus growing and the word “thrive” and i remember that i am loved. she, among many others (mackenzie, rissa, irene, my sisters, mom, christina, grandma, and others) are my faithful blog followers who leave me comments.   comments that encourage me and remind me that what i am doing with my life is meaningful, beautiful and makes a difference in their lives. every comment i get feels like a hug ‘with the extra squeeze.’ so thanks. thank you justin: for being a 3rd brother to sam. kelley:  for the thriving octopus. and you: for reading and following my photography and hearing my life.

it is a gift. thank you.

and samuel: please learn to hear me when i tell you “don’t climb into the dishwasher” for the millionth time.

by anjuli

show 15 comments

Natalie Shapiro - I love you Anjuli! I look up to you so much :) You continue to teach me what loving the Lord, loving your family, and loving others truly looks like.September 30, 2010 - 6:33 pm

kelley brooks - i love the photo of sam and justin (and mystery third guy.;) how cool that you captured this special moment in their lives. and thanks for your kind words. and yep, you are right- what you are doing is beautiful, meaningful and makes a difference in so many lives. and baby samuel- i think you are just on your way to being a very good dishwasher loader. come over to my house if you want more practice.September 30, 2010 - 3:28 pm

Wanida Maertz - Thanks for another bed time story of your life!!! Loved hearing you, as always. Next stop: Baylor!!! In my hottie can't take your eyes off me outfits! Night!!!September 29, 2010 - 11:14 pm

Sam Paschall - Felt every word. I love the picture, I love my friend, and I love you. Thanks for helping me feel what is most true about friendship.September 29, 2010 - 9:53 pm

whitney harvey - i'm usually the silent stalker kind of follower (a little creepy, yes) but as so many others, i look forward to your posts. your realness is refreshing and most certainly inspiring. your photos are just beautiful. aaaaand your adorable kiddos are a bonus :)September 29, 2010 - 9:27 pm

anjuli paschall - thanks for all the extra "squeezes" today. you each are an inspiration to me. thanks for continually walking this journey with me. beautiful words. beautiful hearts.September 29, 2010 - 9:14 pm

Kara - how could i pass up the opportunity to give you a hug with an 'extra squeeze'? I couldn't. i love reading orange wednesdays, as previous commentors said, they give voice to the feelings I can't seem to put words to myself. Thank you for inspiring me, love you!September 29, 2010 - 4:17 pm

rissa - First of all. She made you a quilt that says thrive?? WHAT?? That's pretty much the most amazing thing ever. Second of all. This is my favorite kid-heard moment from the week: the 4 year old misbehaves. I reprimand his attitude and then ask him why he's been reprimanded. He says I don't know. I tell him again. And ask him again to repeat it. He says I don't know. And again and again and again. Like 6 times. I wonder if he's not hearing or if I'm not talking. Maybe I'm just saying words in my head and they're not coming out my mouth. Either way, I want to be heard, too. Third of all. Call me.September 29, 2010 - 3:59 pm

veronica - you are inspiring to me. orange wednesdays get me through the week. Thank you for sharing the way you do and thank you for being the person you are. god has truly blessed you with a gift, spreeding love and understanding to others. You are amazing!September 29, 2010 - 3:10 pm

Christina - :) love this blog.. I've never had a gift with words or with expressing how I'm feeling openly. I've always been really good at keeping things organized. I love people like you. You write so deeply and truthfully and its like you have complete visibility into my heart and my mind. When you write, its like my feelings are being released. Your topics are completely relatable. So, through your writing, I feel like I can make sense of my feelings, and because I understand them more, I feel more whole and more me. :) I LOVE it. That, and your kids are freaking adorable, your pictures are intriguing, and the colors on your blog brighten up my work day. Love you friend!September 29, 2010 - 2:26 pm

brenda - Anjuli, not only do you hear, you ask questions and help me, and I would think others listen to themselves and recieve understanding. It is a rare thing to have a daughter-in-law be one of the people who gets your heart and gets to your heart when you are going through the toughest time of your life, and is instrumental in your healing. You have given me that, and I am so thankful. Keep on writing and sharing your heart, for you have a gift of your words piercing our hearts and confronting us with the everyday that spurs us on. I love you.September 29, 2010 - 1:41 pm

christine unno - anjuli, the more i read what you write the more I'm blown away. you are so real & by being so, you invite your readers to do the same.thank you ... love the way describe juz HOW MUCH justin means to sam and kelley you & others who touch your life... & little sam in the dishwasher, a gem!!!September 29, 2010 - 12:35 pm

renes - Anj...we are inspired, moved, challenged, made to laugh, made to cry, made to smile when we read your blogs. That's how I feel and many would most likely agree and YES, I'm glad that I have you in my life. We are family...in this life and the next. Love you girl! And lil Sam...will keep climbing in the dishwasher even after the billionth time you've told him not to...cause Walle still climbs books shelves, the sides of the stairs on top of picnic tables...anywhere he has fallen from...pain from falling doesn't seem to stick in their minds...only the thrill of exploration...or they are just boys as they say.September 29, 2010 - 11:20 am

jessica - you continue to amaze me how you share so openly and so profoundly. anjuli, you are beautiful - the gift of being heard. how important and how fortunate that you have those if your life who hear you and see you - also because you dare to show yourself. =)September 29, 2010 - 10:17 am

Miriam Maneevone - Yes, what a gift to be heard, really heard, not just "uh" interspersed absentmindedly. Anjuli- you hear well. You hear the heart behind the words. One feels safe when you hear. It is not surprising that others return this gift. To have your voice (heart) heard without judgement is such a priceless gift. To know and be fully known and loved- no one can do this like Abba can. Yet I am chagrinned how often I don't hear His voice. With Him I am heard - fully and completely. Though I am deeply fallen, how wonderful to be deeply loved. It's taken me a long time to hear my Savior well and obey even when I don't understand... Be patient with Samuel, it will take him a while to hear your voice and obey, too. (But it does look like he is trying to be responsible about his sippy cup! Don't you ask him also to put his things away? :-) Just kidding.) As he hears and obeys you in daily living, surely, one day, both he and Manoah will hear and obey Abba, the one who matters most. BTW- the Octopus is cute... I couldn't "picture" it :) Thrills me that you have such wonderful friends!September 29, 2010 - 9:54 am

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